think? or feel? ( thoughts)

apparently, death is when there is enough cessation of necessary functioning cells that regeneration doesnt suffice. like most things, this is half the image. Janus is perhaps the most frequently underrated god. like to math, there is a soul in understanding what the equation means, on graph, in form and figure, in truth, the message that it delivers without interfering itself directly into the idea behind the equation, life and death are held in a closely intertwined braid of the physical and metaphysical. the physical is science. it tries to explains through logic. to see clearly like an equation. to make from A to B. But the form has always been there. its message, in its beauty and its pain has been there. and so the metaphysical. A phenomenon that can be explained by the secretion of certain chemicals in the brain. writing this feel like being cheated on. like saying that love is just positive reinforcement, that what bonds you forge are not of much meaning beyond a jar full of oxytocin and a few thousand neural pathways. but beyond the physical lies metaphysical unexplaining why then that we are overcome with endless grief despite still holding these same pathways still. why i comprehend and not simply react, why every time I recall, my eyes swell with streams of stories that will have reached the sea. why the voice breaks into incoherent fragments, threatening to loose purpose. why despite never believing in a power that holds above us, i pray for safe passage through the afterlife. why i pray for the existence of an afterlife, even if it be one where they might stroll through the field of reeds, safe, forever, existing. It is not that the metaphysical is unexplained but rather that it is uncontained by the physical. when a person leaves the mortal world, they leave in their selves, their body, their mind, their ideas and views, griefs and joys but live on in ourselves, in our body, in our mind, in our ideas and views, griefs and sorrows.